Gossip
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This sermon deals with a common and often under-emphasized abuse - Gossip. In this sermon I suggest that gossip is tool by which Satan twists our God-given impulses to build intimacy and share good news and distorts them into a sharing of news not worth sharing at the expense of others. It builds a fragile intimacy and does great harm to the Body of Christ.
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Gossip
- 1. Sharing the News NOT Worth Sharing
- 2. Sharing the News NOT Worth Sharing “Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.” Erma Bombeck
- 3. Sharing the News NOT Worth Sharing “All of us have moments in our lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with a white carpet is one of them.” Erma Bombeck
- 4. Sharing the News NOT Worth Sharing “I take a very practical view of raising children. I put a sign in each of their rooms: 'Checkout Time is 18 years.'” Erma Bombeck
- 5. Sharing the News NOT Worth Sharing “If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead.” Erma Bombeck
- 6. Sharing the News NOT Worth Sharing “Don't confuse fame with success. Madonna is one; Helen Keller is the other.” Erma Bombeck
- 7. Sharing the News NOT Worth Sharing “Some say our national pastime is baseball. Not me. It's gossip.” Erma Bombeck
- 8. Sharing the News NOT Worth Sharing Gossip in the Workplace •15% occasionally gossip •86% gossip regarding corporate challenges •Each gossip session averages 15 minutes •21% regularly gossip at work •An active gossiper burns 65 hours of productivity per year
- 9. Sharing the News NOT Worth Sharing First Point God has hard-wired us to share news!
- 10. Sharing the News NOT Worth Sharing God gave us our ability to speak The LORD said to him, "Who gave human beings their mouths? Who makes them deaf or mute? Who gives them sight or makes them blind? Is it not I, the LORD? Exodus 4:11 NIV
- 11. Sharing the News NOT Worth Sharing Speaking brings us joy A person finds joy in giving an apt reply— and how good is a timely word! Proverbs 15:23
- 12. Sharing the News NOT Worth Sharing Speaking is one of the key ways we build intimacy and trust Gracious words are like a honeycomb, sweetness to the soul and wealth to the body. Proverbs 16:24
- 13. Sharing the News NOT Worth Sharing Speaking is an essential tool for sharing God’s Good News How then will they call on him in whom they have not believed? And how are they to believe in him of whom they have never heard? And how are they to hear without someone preaching? Romans 10:14
- 14. Sharing the News NOT Worth Sharing Jesus called His disciples to Speak Up! What I tell you in the dark, say in the light, and what you hear whispered, proclaim on the housetops. Matthew 10:27
- 15. Sharing the News NOT Worth Sharing Sir Winston Churchill - 1955
- 16. Sharing the News NOT Worth Sharing
- 17. Sharing the News NOT Worth Sharing Second Point The news you choose to share is a reflection of your heart!
- 18. Sharing the News NOT Worth Sharing Matthew 15 10And he called the people to him and said to them, “Hear and understand: 11it is not what goes into the mouth that defiles a person, but what comes out of the mouth; this defiles a person.”
- 19. Sharing the News NOT Worth Sharing Matthew 15 12Then the disciples came and said to him, “Do you know that the Pharisees were offended when they heard this saying?”
- 20. Sharing the News NOT Worth Sharing Matthew 15 13He answered, “Every plant that my heavenly Father has not planted will be rooted up. 14Let them alone; they are blind guides. And if the blind lead the blind, both will fall into a pit.”
- 21. Sharing the News NOT Worth Sharing Context: Mt. 15:1-2 (NIV) 1Then some Pharisees and teachers of the law came to Jesus from Jerusalem and asked, 2 “Why do your disciples break the tradition of the elders? They don’t wash their hands before they eat!”
- 22. Sharing the News NOT Worth Sharing “Al Netilat Yadayim” Washing of Hands
- 23. Sharing the News NOT Worth Sharing Yadaim (Hands) “If a man poured water over the one hand with a single rinsing, his hand is clean; but if over both hands with a single rinsing, Rabbi Meir declares them unclean unless he pours over them a quarter-log (2 cups) or more. (M Yadaim 2:1)
- 24. Sharing the News NOT Worth Sharing Matthew 15 “15But Peter said to him, “Explain the parable to us.” 16And he said, “Are you also still without understanding?
- 25. Sharing the News NOT Worth Sharing Matthew 15 17Do you not see that whatever goes into the mouth passes into the stomach and is expelled? 18But what comes out of the mouth proceeds from the heart, and this defiles a person.
- 26. Sharing the News NOT Worth Sharing 3 Lessons 1. He is teaching them about His authority which supersedes that of the Pharisees. 2. He is teaching them the difference between dead orthodoxy and living faith. 3. He is teaching them that the words we speak reveal the spiritual condition of our “heart.”
- 27. Sharing the News NOT Worth Sharing Matthew 15 19For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false witness, slander. 20These are what defile a person. But to eat with unwashed hands does not defile anyone.”
- 28. Sharing the News NOT Worth Sharing
- 29. Sharing the News NOT Worth Sharing Third Point Choosing Not to Share News NOT Worth Sharing Breaks the Cycle of Destruction.
- 30. Sharing the News NOT Worth Sharing James 3 5How great a forest is set ablaze by such a small fire! 6 And the tongue is a fire, a world of unrighteousness. The tongue is set among our members, staining the whole body, setting on fire the entire course of life, and set on fire by hell.
- 31. Sharing the News NOT Worth Sharing Proverbs 16:28 A dishonest man spreads strife, and a whisperer separates close friends.
- 32. Sharing the News NOT Worth Sharing Proverbs 6:16-19 There are six things that the Lord hates, seven that are an abomination to him: haughty eyes, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood, a heart that devises wicked plans, feet that make haste to run to evil, a false witness who breathes out lies, and one who sows discord among brothers.
- 33. Sharing the News NOT Worth Sharing Proverbs 26:20 For lack of wood the fire goes out, and where there is no whisperer, quarreling ceases.
- 35. Sharing the News NOT Worth Sharing “Live in such a way that you would not be afraid to sell your parrot to the town gossip.” Will Rogers
- 36. Sharing the News NOT Worth Sharing
- 37. Sharing the News NOT Worth Sharing Anonymous Quote “Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people.”
- 38. Sharing the News NOT Worth Sharing
Editor's Notes
- First Point God has hard-wired us to share news!
- God gave us our ability to speak The LORD said to him, "Who gave human beings their mouths? Who makes them deaf or mute? Who gives them sight or makes them blind? Is it not I, the LORD? Exodus 4:11 NIV
- We find joy in using our tongues A person finds joy in giving an apt reply— and how good is a timely word! Proverbs 15:23
- Speaking is one of the key ways we build intimacy and trust Gracious words are like a honeycomb, sweetness to the soul and whealth to the body. Proverbs 16:24
- Speaking is an essential tool for sharing God’s Good News How then will they call on him in whom they have not believed? And how are they to believe in him of whom they have never heard? And how are they to hear without someone preaching? Romans 10:14
- Jesus called His disciples to Speak Up! What I tell you in the dark, say in the light, and what you hear whispered, proclaim on the housetops. Matthew 10:27
- I’d like to begin today with a story. Winston Churchill exemplified integrity and respect in the face of opposition. During his last year in office, he attended an official ceremony. Several rows behind him two gentlemen began whispering. “That’s Winston Churchill.” “They say he is getting senile.” “They say he should step aside and leave the running of the nation to more dynamic and capable men.” When the ceremony was over, Churchill turned to the men and said, “Gentlemen, they also say he is deaf!” Barbara Hatcher, Vital Speeches, March 1, 1987
- Second Point The news you choose to share is a reflection of your heart!
- Turn with me to Matthew 15. Let’s start reading at verse 10: 10And he called the people to him and said to them, “Hear and understand: 11it is not what goes into the mouth that defiles a person, but what comes out of the mouth; this defiles a person.”
- 12Then the disciples came and said to him, “Do you know that the Pharisees were offended when they heard this saying?” 13He answered, “Every plant that my heavenly Father has not planted will be rooted up. Notice that Jesus’ disciples are concerned about the Pharisees reaction. Their reaction demonstrates that the disciples, at this point, steill held the Pharisees in high regard. They were raised to place these men on a pedestal, and this old habit did not die easily.
- 13He answered, “Every plant that my heavenly Father has not planted will be rooted up. 14Let them alone; they are blind guides. And if the blind lead the blind, both will fall into a pit.” Notice, in contrast that Jesus doesn’t back down one iota He states clearly that it is the Heavenly Father’s intention to “root up” the Pharisees… to pull them out like a weed. He refers to them as blind guides… follow them and you’re going to land in a pit. Jesus reaction is strong. What lie at the root of this strong clash? In order to fully understand what is happening here we need to reach back to the first two verses of Matthew 15.
- 1Then some Pharisees and teachers of the law came to Jesus from Jerusalem and asked, 2 “Why do your disciples break the tradition of the elders? They don’t wash their hands before they eat!”
- Hand washing was not a biblical command. This Jewish practice was a tradition of the Pharisees which eventually made its way into a third century Jewish collection of these traditions called The Mishnah of Rabbi Judah the Prince. One entire tractate of the Mishnah, , Yadaim, deals with “hands” specifying every imaginable detail of ritual washing of hands. Here is a sample.
- “If a man poured water over the one hand with a single rinsing, his hand is clean; but if over both hands with a single rinsing, Rabbi Meir declares them unclean unless he pours over them a quarter-log (2 cups) or more. (M Yadaim 2:1) It is important to realize that Jesus neither despised nor abrogated the Law of Moses. He did, however, reject these “traditions of the elders” which focused on extra-biblical minutiae. Consistently, Jesus focus was on the heart and spirit of the law.
- “15But Peter said to him, “Explain the parable to us.” 16And he said, “Are you also still without understanding? How do we explain Jesus’ tone here? Frustration? Perhaps. I suspect that there is something more. Firmness. Jesus is establishing the lines of authority. His disciples are used to deferring to the spiritual authority of the Pharisees. This must stop. They must begin to look to him for their understanding.
- 16And he said, “Are you also still without understanding? 17Do you not see that whatever goes into the mouth passes into the stomach and is expelled? 18But what comes out of the mouth proceeds from the heart, and this defiles a person. Jesus, the master teacher, is teaching His disciples three lessons at the same time.
- 3 Lessons He is teaching them about His authority which supersedes that of the Pharisees. He is teaching them the difference between dead orthodoxy and living faith. He is teaching them that the words we speak reveal the spiritual condition of our “heart.”
- 19For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false witness, slander. 20These are what defile a person. But to eat with unwashed hands does not defile anyone.” I want you to see something very important in this text. This list contains some of what we would call the baddest of the bad sins. Murder… adultery… sexual immorality… theft. With regard to our salvation, sin is a level playing field. All sin is sin. Our AWANA kids reminded many of us of these truths in our Communication Sunday during the Bible Fellowship Hour. They quoted Romans 3:23 that reminds us that we are all sinners. And they quoted Romans 6:23 that tells us that the penalty, or “wages” of sin is spiritual death. Any sin not covered by the blood of Jesus’ cross is a capital offense. However, when it comes to the damage that sin does to us, there do seem to be some that are God’s felonies. These are the sins that result in the most far-reaching consequences. They do the most damage to us and to those around us. Murder… adultery… sexual immorality… theft. These are the sins that steal life, compromise purity and destroy livelihood. But notice the last two sins that come out of the unrepentant heart: false witness and slander. These are sins of the tongue. These are the sins we often wink at. In our minds we see them as misdemeanors… more slip-up than serious sin. But I can’t miss the fact that Jesus makes no disctinction here. These are, all of them, defiling sins.
- Third Point Choosing Not to Share News NOT Worth Sharing Breaks the Cycle of Destruction.
- James 3 5How great a forest is set ablaze by such a small fire! 6 And the tongue is a fire, a world of unrighteousness. The tongue is set among our members, staining the whole body, setting on fire the entire course of life, and set on fire by hell. In James chapter 3, James teaches that the tongue has a powerful effect… an effect beyond it’s small size. He compares it to the tiny bit in the mouth of a horse that steers this animal that weighs between 900 and 1200 pounds. He also compares the tongue to the comparatively tiny rudder that steers even a gigantic ship. Finally, James tells us that the tongue is a spark… a tiny little spark that can cause a great fire. The tongue is a spark, and when we misuse our tongues, we are arsonists. We’ve all seen how a gossip can literally create chaos, lighting one fire after another.
- The book of Proverbs has a lot to say about gossip and gossipers. Proverbs 16:28 says: A dishonest man spreads strife, and a whisperer separates close friends. We know this to be true. A gossip is a wedge who splits people up. He or she separates people again and again until chaos reigns supreme.
- Perhaps that is why God gives these abuses of the tongue such bad press. In Proverbs 6:16-19 we read: There are six things that the Lord hates, seven that are an abomination to him: haughty eyes, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood, a heart that devises wicked plans, feet that make haste to run to evil, a false witness who breathes out lies, and one who sows discord among brothers. You may well have heard that there is a Hebrew literary device in this text that is crucial to a proper understanding. God doesn’t forget one item on the list and them remember it at the last moment. We do that all the time, but not the all-knowing God. When God says six yea seven that means these first 6 are important, but this last one is most important. This is a form of strong emphasis. And notice what is in the emphatic end of the list: the wedge. That person who spreads lies and shatters unity. But there is one other Proverb I want us to consider this morning. We saw in James 3 the power that the tongue has to spark fires. But the tongue can actually have the opposite effect.
- Proverbs 26:20 For lack of wood the fire goes out, and where there is no whisperer, quarreling ceases. Gossip spreads like wildfire… but like wildfire, it needs fuel to spread. No wood, no fire. Maybe you’re not a very confrontational person. You’re not the person to tell the gossip to shut up. But there is something that even the most timid of us can do that is powerful. Be selective in what you pass on. By refusing to gossip and by modeling kindness to others, you start taking away the fuel that feeds discord. I think that we often operate with the an incomplete filter, and that is what gets us in trouble. In our minds we think, if it’s not true, I’m not going to share it… but if it’s true, then I am free to speak. That’s not the wrong filter – it’s not enough of a filter. Not every truth needs to be shared. Think if someone know all your secrets, and then shared them. If someone hacked your Facebook pages message section, the stuff you’d never put on your wall, and moved it from the message section to the wall where everyone could see. There’s a whole lot of truth that would be devastating to us. Stuff we never should have said, even to our closest friend. The Truth filter is the wrong filter. I would like to close this morning with a more complete filter. The THINK filter.
- THINK T- is it TRUE H- is it Helpful? I- Is it Inspiring? N- Is it Necessary? K- Is it Kind? Some gossip can meet one or two of these criteria, especially the truth factor. But once you lump them together, It’s amazing. It’s like running contaminated water through five filters. What one doesn’t catch, the others will.
- What do these teenagers have in common? All were the victims of vicious gossip and cyber-bullying. All of them reached a point of desperation. One switched her name on her social media site to “That Dead Girl” just minutes before taking her life. And the two girls on the side… they were sisters. Erin Gallagher committed suicide after years of destructive gossip. She took her life at 13. Two months later, her sister Shannon, stricken with grief ended her life. Shannon was 15. I understand that these are the exceptions. Most gossip never leads to these kind of consequences. But it does produce misery, and you need to decide what kind of person you want to be.
- I close today with this anonymous quote. It is often attributed to Eleanor Roosevelt, but it actually has evolved over more than a century: “Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people.” “Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people.” Three types of people. Only you can decide which one of them you want to be. But understand, that if your choice is to be a great mind that discusses ideas while seeking God’s wisdom, while seeking God’s worldview and people from the vantage point of God’s love for them, you will become one of God’s favorite kind of people, one who builds others up not at the expense of God’s truth but around and because of God’s truth.