Personal Development K to 12 Program

1. Personal Relationship
Josefino T. Larena ,ABCPS,CPE,MPA

2. Learning Objectives
• Discuss an understanding of teenage
relationship, including the acceptable and
unacceptable expressions of attractions.
• Express his or her ways of showing attraction,
love and commitment.
• Identify ways to become responsible in a
relationship and
• Appraise one’s relationships and make plans
for building responsible future relationship.

3. What is Personal Relationship
• The concept of relationship is
very broad and complex. In
our model, personal
relationships refer to close
connections between people,
formed by emotional bonds
and interactions. These bonds
often grow from and are
strengthened by mutual
experiences.

4. A healthy relationship with friends is a
source of lifetime happiness

5. How are attachments developed
• Attachment theory is a concept in developmental
psychology that concerns the importance of
"attachment" in regards to personal
development. Specifically, it makes the claim that
the ability for an individual to form an emotional
and physical "attachment" to another person
gives a sense of stability and security necessary to
take risks, branch out, and grow and develop as a
personality. Naturally, attachment theory is a
broad idea with many expressions, and the best
understanding of it can be had by looking at
several of those expressions in turn.

6. John Bowlby
• Psychologist John Bowlby
was the first to coin the
term. His work in the late
60s established the
precedent that childhood
development depended
heavily upon a child's ability
to form a strong relationship
with "at least one primary
caregiver". Generally
speaking, this is one of the
parents.

7. Attachment styles as defined by by
Ainsworth,Blekar and Wall 1978
• 1.Secure attachment is
classified by children who
show some distress when
their caregiver leaves but
are able to compose
themselves and do
something knowing that
their caregiver will return.
Children with secure
attachment feel protected
by their caregivers, and they
know that they can depend
on them to return.

8. • 2.Avoidant Attachment-
Parents of children with
an avoidant/anxious
attachment tend to be
emotionally unavailable
or unresponsive to them
a good deal of the time.
They disregard or ignore
their children's needs,
and can be especially
rejecting when their
child is hurt or sick.

9. • 3. Anxious-ambivalent
attachment is when the
infant feels separation
anxiety when separated from
the caregiver and does not
feel reassured when the
caregiver returns to the
infant. Anxious-avoidant
attachment is when the
infant avoids their parents.
Disorganized attachment is
when there is a lack of
attachment behavior.

10. 3 Brain Systems of Love: Lust,
Attraction, and Attachment
• While love is complicated and
can’t simply be reduced to
three biological brain states,
there are clear neurochemical
processes that do contribute
to feelings of love. While not
called ‘love’, the desire to
mate with a specific individual
is not limited to humans, but
exists across many species.
The drive to find a mate,
bond, and reproduce is called
the ‘attraction system’. This
system is made up of three
fundamental pathways -- lust,
attraction and attachment –
which occur in both birds and
mammals (including humans).

11. What Drives Attraction
• 1. Lust-Is sex really all that guys think about?
Possibly. But women think about it too. Lust is
our sex drive or libido and it is in part driven
by the hormones testosterone and estrogen.
Lust refers to an urge or desire that motivates
us to partake in sexual activity. This desire to
be involved in sexual activity is there
regardless of whether someone has a sexual
partner or not.

12. • 2 Attraction -Although often
described as part of lust,
attraction is distinguished from
lust because it involves focusing
our attention to a particular
person or desire. Lust on the
other hand is our libido; it is the
underlying urge for sexual
gratification. Attraction is also in
part driven by different
hormones than is lust, with
adrenaline, dopamine and
serotonin playing key roles.
Ultimately, engaging in sexual
activity may be just as dependent
upon individual attraction as it is
upon lust

13. • 3. Attachment-
Attachment is a
deep and enduring
emotional bond
that connects one
person to another
across time and
space (Ainsworth,
1973; Bowlby,
1969).

14. • We have previously
presented the biological
model of love as
anthropologist Helen
Fisher explained in her
theory that the
experience of love
comes in three
overlapping stages and
where certain
hormones are involved
in each stage lust,
attraction and
attachment.

15. The Rozenberg Quarterly mentions
several theories on attraction
• 1. Transference effect-
Transference is a
phenomenon
characterized by
unconscious
redirection of feelings
from one person to
another.

16. • 2. Propinquity Effect-The
propinquity effect is the
tendency for people to
form friendships or
romantic relationships
with those whom they
encounter often,
forming a bond between
subject and friend.
Occupational
propinquity, based on a
person's career, is also
commonly seen as a
factor in marriage
selection

17. • Similarity-the state of
being similar;
likeness;
resemblance. 2. an
aspect, trait, or
feature like or
resembling another
or another's: a
similarity of diction.

18. • Reciprocity-In social
psychology,
reciprocity is a social
rule that says people
should repay, in kind,
what another person
has provided for
them; that is, people
give back
(reciprocate) the kind
of treatment they
have received from
another.

19. • 5.Physical
attractiveness is the
degree to which a
person's physical
features are
considered
aesthetically
pleasing or
beautiful. The term
often implies sexual
attractiveness or
desirability, but can
also be distinct from
either.

20. • Personality Characteristics
and Traits-
• Five major traits underlie
personality, according to
psychologists. They are
introversion/extroversion,
openness,
conscientiousness,
extraversion,
agreeableness and
neuroticism.

21. Love and Intimacy

22. Love is beautiful

23. Three components of Triangular
theory of love
• 1.Intimacy-An
intimate relationship
is an interpersonal
relationship that
involves physical
and/or emotional
intimacy. Physical
intimacy is
characterized by
friendship, platonic
love, romantic love or
sexual activity.

24. • 2. Commitment- a
promise to do or give
something. : a
promise to be loyal
to someone or
something. : the
attitude of someone
who works very hard
to do or support
something.

25. • 3. Passion- is a
very strong
feeling about a
person or thing.
Passion is an
intense
emotion, a
compelling
enthusiasm or
desire for
something.

26. Sternberg’s Triangular Theory of Love

27. Commitment Saying Yes and Meaning
It

28. Rozenberg QUARTERLY
• 1.Accumulation of all rewards of the
relationship

29. • 2.Temptation of Alternative partners

30. • 3. Investments made by the couple in the
relationship

31. Four Behaviors married couples may
do that can predict a divorce or
separation
• Criticism

32. • Denial of the existence of conflict

33. • 3. Contempt

34. Responsibilities in a Relationship
• 1. Be Responsible for what you think and say
to other person

35. • 2.Be responsible for what you think and say to
your family

36. • 3. Ensure the relationship is mutually
beneficial

37. • 4. Respect the other party or parties involved

38. • Be ready to provide support when needed

39. Summarizing
• Relationship are necessary for our
survival as species and as an
individual. Relationship define our
own humanity, because through our
interaction with others, we learn
about human behaviour and
emotions, and how to communicate
with each other.

43. Thank you so much