Paper The Word Is Pretty Paper. True Stories. And Sc
Hair Issue
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2. THE STRAIN RECAP
The vampire-zombie virus is nearing critical
mass, and people just keep on dying in
gruesome ways. Yes, please.
2 V O X M A G A Z I N E . C O M | 0 8 . 0 7 . 1 4
This week Online
We’re social.
NEW ROOTS
AUGUST 7, 2014
VOLUME 16 ISSUE 30 | PUBLISHED BY
THE COLUMBIA MISSOURIAN
320 LEE HILLS HALL
COLUMBIA, MO // 573-884-6432
CAN’T GET ENOUGH VOX?
DOWNLOAD THE IPAD APP
V O X M A G A Z I N E / / 0 8 . 0 7 . 1 4 / / F R E E E V E R Y T H U R S D AY
BETH CASTLE
EDIT-HAIR IN CHIEF
Feature
Hair, hair everywhere, with facts to spare. This
11-page exposé gets to the root of roots. Follow us
from follicle to fauxhawk 70 times over. PAGE 7
NEWS & INSIGHT
Tomato baths aren’t just for dogs. Discover five natural
remedies from the farmers market. PAGE 4
THE SCENE
Barbers hear all about your life, but what do you know
about theirs? Get the conversation going here. PAGE 6
MUSIC
Oh, Lord, play that barbershop chord. Four a capella
singers form an old-fashioned quartet. PAGE 18
ARTS
Cosplay enthusiasts are all about their ’dos. You can’t
go Super Saiyan without a spiky yellow wig. PAGE 19
BOOKS
Check out spine tingling tales—perfect perm pastimes.
These reads will turn your hair white. PAGE 20
Corrections: There were several errors in the July 31
feature, A More Perfect Union. Victoria Yu is senior
advisor of the Asian American Association. The
city of Guangxi is in southern China. Melody Man
understands Cantonese, her grandparents’ language,
but is not fully fluent.
COVER DESIGN LEAH BEANE, AARON FRANCO
COVER PHOTOS LEAH BEANE, TJ THOMSON
THE MOCKINGBIRD NEXT DOOR
A reporter buries her lead in this memoir,
which is more about her than it is Harper
Lee. That said, it’s worth scouting out.
THE RETURN OF THE PETTY
He’s such a heartbreaker. Tom Petty and his
band return with Hypnotic Eye. Free fall into
this classic, if clichéd, album.
PHOTOSBYLEAHBEANE;TJTHOMSON
Last summer I moved to Columbia. And I cut my hair. The two things
are actually related. The entire month before I left my North Carolina
hometown, I had a Coco Chanel quote set as my iPhone background.
“A woman who cuts her hair is about to change her life.” It was a little
cliché, but for me, it was exceptionally true.
Up until then, I’d had soft dark curls that reached past my shoulder
blades. To me, every inch of my hair represented pride, femininity and,
to be frank, vanity. I thought losing too much length would change who
I was and how I felt about myself.
But that summer I was accepted into the Missouri School of
Journalism’s graduate program, and even with my long hair, I knew I
was destined to change. The move felt big, and I felt very small.
If there’s a lesson in this week’s theme issue, it’s that hair is
emotional. Countless traditions, myths and beauty standards dictate
how we manage our manes. But how our hair makes us feel is often
more influential than hormones or melanin counts. In fact, the hardest
part of putting this issue together was deciding how to balance
scientific fact and emotion. There’s no way to fact check why a person
favors a fauxhawk over a crew cut.
That’s why when you read this week’s feature, I want you to
keep my hair in mind. I’ve lived in Columbia for exactly one year this
week, and I still remember how my hair looked the day I arrived. It
was a curly crop that hit just above my chin. The cut puffed a little too
much on one side, coiled into unruly spirals at the back and frizzed
triumphantly in the summer humidity.
It was the shortest my hair had ever been. And it was invigorating.
Edit-hair in chief: Beth Castle Editor: Laura Heck Deputy Editor: Dani Vanderboegh Managing Editor: Winn Duvall Art Directors: Lauren Elliott, Aaron Franco Photo Editor: Leah
Beane Digital Managing Editor: Justin Paprocki VoxTalk Editor: Abbey Dean iPad Art Director: Janet Lee iPad Assistants: Roselyn Adams, Allison Shapiro News & Insight/The
Scene Editors: Beth Castle, Rebecca Dell, Sean Morrison Music/Arts & Books Editors: Nicole Jones, Caleb O’Brien Contributing Writers: Elissa Chudwin, Sophia Conforti, Christine
Jackson, Alicia Kortendick, Riley Simpson, Rachel Swinney Editorial Director: Heather Lamb Executive Editor: Jennifer Rowe Reporting Beat Leader/Writing Coach: David Reed
Office Manager: Kim Townlain
VOX STAFF
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PHOTOSBYORCOURTESYOFFLICKR:TRAVELBAGLTD;ALHAMBRAPOLICE
DEPARTMENT;WIKIMEDIACOMMONS
SHARK BAIT CLARKTHE DART
The Official Scrabble Players
Dictionary, to be released Aug. 11,
will include 5,000 additional words
familiar to a younger demographic.
Words such as chillax, bromance,
hashtag and selfie can now be played.
Sounds to us like it’s just more words
that will make us pause the game
and check the dictionary.
Radar
DIDN’T ROCKTHE VOTE
Why did the
tortoise cross
the road?
To start a slow-speed police chase,
apparently. Clark, a 150-pound
sulcata tortoise, managed to escape
his home in Alhambra, Calif., while
his owners were out. He made it a
few houses away in an
hours-long escape before
he was apprehended
by the police.
Droves of celebrities are hitching their stars to
nature’s most fierce fish. Rob Lowe cut a Shark
Week promo, and last week’s made-for-TV
sensation, Sharknado 2: The Second One, featured
dozens of B-list cameos.
Here are a few of the fading stars
who’ve jumped (on) the
shark bandwagon:
Andy Dick
Judd Hirsch
Jared Fogel
Biz Markie
Downtown Julie Brown
Billy Ray Cyrus
“The instrument
must be
invisible &
be a guitar,
i.e. air drums
not allowed”
– From the bylaws of the national
air guitar finals taking place
Saturday in Kansas City
Here’s what Missouri’s approximately 4.2
million registered voters care about, according
to Tuesday’s election results.
Not voting
30%
Voting
70%
17% YES: Digital privacy
14% YES: Solidify gun rights
NO: New taxes
13% NO: New lottos
12% YES: Farmer autonomy
Based on the low turn out, here’s how
many voters it took to pass or fail the ballot
amendments:
WORDS OFTHE DAY AIR ONTHE SIDE OF CAUTION
14%
EPIDEMIC
The population
here is asking:
‘You said there
was no cure for Ebola,
but the Americans
are curing it?’”
“
— Liberia’s assistant health minister,
Tolbert Nyenswah, on the use of an
experimental serum to treat two Ebola-
stricken American aid workers
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NEWS INSIGHT
The product market
Natural treatments for your tangled tendrils
BY DOMINIQUE FELDMAN | PHOTO BY SHANNON ELLIOTT
Locally produced vegetables, eggs and honey at Columbia farmers
markets are loved by all, even your hair. Next time you’re picking the
perfect tomatoes and beets for your salads, grab a few extra and treat
your locks to natural beauty solutions you won’t find in the shampoo
aisle. Here are five market-fresh remedies you can try.
BEETS for tinting hair red
Stains are better than strain, at least
when it comes to hair dye. Beet juice
is weaker than commercial dyes, but
it’s also less damaging. Mix an equal
amount of beet juice and carrot juice
together, rub it in your hair and let
it sit for about an hour, preferably
under sunlight. Repeat this process
until you reach your desired shade of
strawberry or red. The dye will stain
your fingers, so wear rubber gloves,
and take care to protect nearby skin
and clothing.
EGGS for overall hair health
It’s a superfood for your strands. Eggs strengthen and soften hair,
add shine and encourage growth. Make your own deep-conditioning
concoction by beating an egg with a dab of olive oil, then work it
through clean, damp hair. Wash it out after 20 minutes max. If you
leave the mix on too long, the protein can dry hair out.
COFFEE for richer hair color
Let’s face it: Especially on those bad hair days,
your mane can be dreadfully dull. Coffee
darkens and adds shine to an otherwise ordinary
look. So, condition your coif with a cup of
strongly brewed coffee for a luscious, dynamic
look. For an added bonus, the caffeine in
coffee does more than get blood pumping; it
encourages hair growth.
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TOMATOES for removing odor
I’m not putting that red gunk in my hair, you
might say. But tomatoes actually help balance
the pH levels in your hair, which restores its
natural smell. Mash some fresh tomatoes, or use
another natural tomato product such as tomato
soup or sauce, and rub it through your hair.
Tomato paste even helps get rid of the green
hair tinge from too many hours spent in the
pool. Warning: Tomato acid can dry hair.
HONEY for conditioning
dry, damaged hair
No, we’re not talking about a beehive
hairdo. Raw honey locks in moisture
and has nutrients that feed hair, which
makes it an easy solution for damaged
strands. Simply apply to clean, damp
hair, then rinse after 20 minutes. Mixing
it with a small amount of olive oil will
loosen the honey and make it easier to
apply. We recommend serving up some
tea and crumpets on the side.
VOXMAGAZINE.COM
Natural products might save money,
but not time. This week on the blog,
two editors experience the ups and
downs of at-home tress therapy.
Mature audiences only. This production contains adult language, adult content, and full puppet nudity.
Book and Lyrics by Robert Lopez Jeff Marx, Book by Jeff Whitty
September 11-14, 18-21, 25-28
Adults $12, Students $11, Seniors $10
It’s just like your life...
only funnier!
www.cectheatre.org
6. 6 V O X M A G A Z I N E . C O M | 0 8 . 0 7 . 1 4
You never used to have to explain the
value of a good barbershop haircut. Your
barber knew how you liked your hair
and cut it just the right way every time.
He or she could give you a perfect shave
or clipper trim, and that made life seem
more manageable. If you look good, you
feel good, right?
But what does it take to become
the person behind the swivel chair? Vox
visited Columbia barbers Adam Prosser
and Brent Benn at Elite Barber Shop and
Quan Hord-Busch at JT’s Cutz to figure
it out.
Buzz words
THE SCENE
You have to complete barber
school — and it’s intense
“The state of Missouri requires a person
to have at least 1,000 hours of schooling,
and then they have to take both a
practical test and a written test to qualify
for a license,” Brent Benn says. Adam
Prosser and Benn, for example, did 1,500
training hours with the Missouri School of
Barbering and Hairstyling. And then there
are the unofficial rites of acceptance.
Quan Hord-Busch says everyone who
cuts hair at his shop has to give a barber
a trim first and get that barber’s approval.
Yes, barbers and cosmetologists
are different
Barbers and cosmetologists get similar
hair apprenticeship experiences with one
crucial difference. “The training, hours
and license requirements for barbers and
beauticians are all the same,” Prosser
says. “But a beautician doesn’t really get
the opportunity to learn to use a straight
razor.” They also don’t work with clippers
as often as barbers do.
They differentiate themselves
from chains with better service
Employees at national chains often come
in with the required apprenticeship hours,
but they might not have much experience
using men’s cutting equipment.That’s
because salons typically take on
employees who have cosmetology
training, but they sometimes lack
traditional barbering experience. “We’ve
done 1,000 hours of clipper training
alone, so there’s a big difference,” Benn
says. Small barbershops differentiate
themselves by offering more time-
intensive services as well. JT’s is a
traditionally black barbershop, so a lot of
customers request styles that need to be
lined up or edged, something the shop
specializes in. “Chain places typically
don’t line,” Hord-Busch says. “It takes
more time, and they just don’t do it.”
Straight-edge razors are pretty
safe in the right hands
Prosser says because straight razors
don’t have a safety guard like modern
razors do, they can nick and even cut
customers with sensitive skin. Barbers
shave more slowly with straight razors for
this reason, and straight-edge veterans
such as Benn and Prosser rarely cut
customers during their traditional shaves.
There is a surprisingly high
demand for young barbers
“It’s a good career for a lot of young guys
to get into, particularly if you like to talk
a lot and connect with people,” Prosser
says. Many traditional barbers are older
and close to retirement, and that creates
high demand for new barbering school
students.
Personal connection is as
important as ever
Benn says building rapport is essential
because of the intimate nature of his
job, and it helps set his business apart
from chain operations. “As soon as you
sit down, I am invading your personal
space, so you have to trust me,” he says.
And it isn’t all about hair, either. For many,
there is history behind their barbershop
of choice. “JT’s has been a staple of
Columbia’s African-American community
for years,” Hord-Busch says. “I have been
coming here to get my hair cut since
1999 and have had the same barber cut
it.” Years later, he’s the one holding the
clippers.
Adam Prosser
and Brent Benn,
top, serve clients
between the ages
of 3 and 80 at
Elite Barber Shop.
Prosser, middle,
gives 10-year-old
Noah Robinson
a trim, while
Benn, left, gives
dad Jay a shave.
Photos by KYLEE
GREGG
Barbers train to be a cut
above the rest
BY PAUL ALBANI-BURGIO
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By Sophia Conforti, Rachel Swinney, Dominique Feldman, Dani Vanderboegh
and Beth Castle • Photos by Leah Beane • Illustrations by Lauren Elliott and Leah Beane
8. 8 V O X M A G A Z I N E . C O M | 0 8 . 0 7 . 1 4
If I must refer to a part of my body by its diseased name,
the appropriate name would be vitiligo. It’s a tricky
condition: Essentially, a person’s immune system begins
to destroy the body’s supply of melanin, and cells are
bleached white in a manner similar to albinism.
The disease started in seventh grade as a white speck
of skin that wouldn’t tan away. By the time I got to high
school, my entire left eyebrow was bright white and was
the most notorious of my teenage insecurities.
Back then, I usually reacted poorly to strangers asking
what was wrong with me. For a while, it was a fun defense
mechanism to come up with elaborate lies about my
eyebrow: severely burned in a house fire, a bad chemistry
accident, lasting scar from a shark attack.
Going into my sophomore year of high school, my
mother offered to have the eyebrow dyed. She said it
would look exactly the same as it used to — identical
to my other one. I thought of the exciting possibilities:
I would be able to talk to girls. I could finally be more
outgoing. My confidence would skyrocket, and every part
of my life would improve.
But I wouldn’t be me.
While looking at myself in the mirror one day, I
realized my face was unmistakably my face. Each part,
eyebrow included, is just as much a part of me as my
sense of humor, dreams and memories. It had played a
major role in shaping who I was then and who I would be.
I couldn’t cover it up.
I don’t mean to say people are defined by their
physical appearance, but the way you look is part of
what makes you you. Confidence doesn’t come from
looking the way you want to look, but from wanting to
be yourself, even the strange and uncomfortable parts of
yourself. Like a white eyebrow.
When you hair becomes darker, blame your
genes. According to Discover magazine,
melanin levels rise as we get older, and
those cause pigment changes throughout
the body. Researchers can’t quite pin down
what triggers that dimmer switch, but most
attribute it to hormone changes. As if puberty
weren’t hard enough.
A bad haircut doesn’t have a
quick fix, but growth can be
kickstarted. By maintaining
a nutritious diet, massaging
your scalp and, duh, washing
regularly, you can pick up the
pace. Delora Crane, a hair
designer at Regis, says to trim
hair by 1/4 inch every six to
eight weeks and take biotin for
hair, nails and skin. But if you
develop Rapunzel gel, let us
know, won’t you?
Cuts lose their color when cells stop
producing melanin. But the age people start
graying varies widely. Genetics and other
factors such as ethnicity play a big role.
Scientists still don’t have a full grasp on the
process, though, so that’s probably making
them go gray, too.
Nope. Hammurabi had an eye for an eye;
we have a gray for a gray. A follicle with
dying pigment only affects a single strand of
hair, so plucking one gray hair just causes a
replacement to grow in its place.
No, but oxidized copper
particles that float in the pool
do. The best defense against
these metal molecules is a
post-swim rinse. Shower in
lukewarm water to get aquatic
specks out of your mane.
Does chlorine
turn blond hair
Does your hair get darker as
you get older?
When does most hair begin
going gray?
If you pluck one gray hair, do
more grow in its place?
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PHOTOSBYORCOURTESYOFFLICKR:MATEUS,FREDDYCAT1,GEOFFREYCHANDLER,GRACEWELLS533,JULKA6,LAUNDRYBROAD,LAURALOVEDAY3,MIKELAGIRREGABIRIA,EYESONFIRE89,PIMKIE;MATTHEWPATSTON
The answer is simple: pop culture.
The blonde stereotype traces back to
18th-century Paris, when courtesan
and ballerina Rosalie Duthé was
known for her beauty and, well,
buffoonery. Her well-recognized dim-
wittedness was featured in a play, and
thus the dumb blonde character came
to be. Duthé’s legacy spurred centuries
of light-haired tropes: Burlesque
troupe British Blonde came to New
York in the 1860s, around the time the
Brits coined the term “dizzy blondes”
to describe risqué performers. And
in 1953, Marilyn Monroe’s portrayal
of Lorelei Lee, the protagonist of
Gentlemen Prefer Blondes, cemented the
idea that blondes are fun-loving and
not serious.
How did dumb
blonde jokes start?
When your fro doesn’t match those
hairs below, call it parental influence.
Hair color is inherited, and it’s
determined by the ratio of two kinds of
melanin: eumelanin and pheomelanin.
A high amount of eumelanin with low
pheomelanin creates dark hair, but if
the ratio switches, then auburn, red and
blonde hues appear.
Because each person is different,
ratios vary, and so too does the amount
of melanin in different parts of the
body. So, no, the drapes don’t always
match the carpet, and yes, your pubes
might gray out.
Later in life, follicles stop producing
melanin, causing hair to turn grey or
white. But don’t worry, there are plenty
of online retailers that sell pubic hair
dye. We’ll let you Google that one on
your own.
Does the carpet
match the drapes?
Temperamental
Less attractive
Maybe barhopping isn’t your thing, but
psychologists in 2011 and 2012 thought
pickup attraction was worth study. Both the
Scandanavian and French journals showed
attraction has hair-color prejudices when women
are viewed from a barstool. Here’s a look some of
the hair assumptions that affect men’s perception
of women:
Healthier
Youthful
Needy Intelligent
Arrogant
Approachable
Competent
Hair at first sight
10. Honest Abe
was the first
president to
rock a beard.
10 V O X M A G A Z I N E . C O M | 0 8 . 0 7 . 1 4
I have very curly hair and have always struggled with
what to do with it. In the late 1960s and part of the
1970s, my hairstyle was a French twist. I slept on huge
rollers to straighten it out and make it smooth. I wore it
that way for 10 years.
When I finally decided to get it cut, my mother said,
“Oh, I am so glad you changed your hairstyle. It made
you look so old.” But the real reason I changed it was
because one of the beauty shops was advertising free
styling with a cut. So, I did it.
Not everyone knows how to deal with curly hair,
though, and mine would not cooperate. In desperation,
I called Jerry’s Hair Salon, which had a great reputation
at the time. They were booked up but said one
hairdresser, Bessie, at their salon on Old 63 might have
time to take a look. I called her, and she said she had 15
minutes free.
Well, bless her heart. She took one look at my hair
and said, “I know just what to do with it, and I’ll do it
right now.” I loved that woman.
That switch ushered in my Afro days and, finally, my
no-hair days. Now, it’s just short and easy.
Marsha, Marsha, Marsha. Please stop counting
your brush strokes. Excessive grooming, styling
products, hair tools and poor nutrition cause
breakage. And certain hairstyles — ponytails and
ballerina buns — can be just as harmful.
Why did wigs become popular?
Vanity and sex. A sexually
transmitted disease, that is.
Around the 1600s, there was
a syphilis epidemic in Europe,
and one of the symptoms was
hair loss. Hair was considered
an important status symbol,
so kings hired wigmakers to
cover up their noggins. Cue
a centuries-long trend that
is now only seen in courts
and on Founding Fathers.
If your floor is riddled with
stray pieces of metal, chalk
it up to history. Prehistoric
societies used one-pronged
sticks to pin back their
flyaways thousands of years
before you tried to vacuum.
The modern bobby didn’t
make an appearance until the
1920s, when women began
cutting their long lengths
down to bobs. The hairstyle,
often worn finger-curled
against the face, needed
help staying in place, and in
exchange, the bobby pin took
its name.
When the short bob hairstyle
became popular, women
stopped wearing hairnets, so
purchases fell dramatically.
To make up for sales, leading
hairnet manufacturer Venida
hired a publicist who claimed
food workers with uncovered
hair posed major health risks.
Soon after, states began
passing new laws requiring
workers to wear hairnets.
Blame it on your roots, baby. The
symmetry of a follicle determines
whether it curls. When the hair origin
is asymmetric, the strand takes on an
ovalular shape and curl. If it’s symmetric,
the strand grows round and straight.
Why is some hair curly?
What causes hair breakage?
Count on your follicles. Literally. The
more follicles or the bigger follicles you
have, the thicker the hair. Thanks, Mom
and Dad.
What determines your
hair thickness?
Pin tryst
Cast away
straight curly spiral
coiled
wavy
11. 0 8 . 0 7 . 1 4 | V O X M A G A Z I N E . C O M 11
PHOTOSBYORCOURTESYOFFLICKR:WALLYGOBETZ,NINIANREED,ROXWEB,SIDIBEAUTY,THEBEESKNEES,UNDONE,FLOWS_2000,FLORBELA,ROCOR;WIKIMEDIACOMMONS;CAROLYNSTEINHAUS
Sometimes hair is a statement.
Coined after the word “Afro-
American,” the puff became
popular around the 1960s as a
natural alternative to chemically
straightening or ironing curly black
hair. But what was a styling switch
for some was a social movement
for others. Political activists such as
Angela Davis and Jesse Jackson led
a rounded revolution that expressed
black pride and rebelled against
white-centric beauty standards.
Afro
Popularized by rappers such as Big
Daddy Kane, Schoolly D and Doug
E. Fresh, the high-top fade peaked
in the late 1980s and faded in as the
Jheri curled out. It died down in the
1990s but flared back up as an ironic
2000s throwback hairstyle. And
what made this a cool coif? The
buzzed sides leave room for designs
to be etched into the side.
High-top fadeAnd you thought crimped hair was
just for My Little Pony toys. Ironing
hair into tight, zig-zagged kinks was
de rigueur in the ’80s but trailed off
in the ’90s. Until Hilary Duff and
Co. took to the small screen, that
is. Remember that Aaron Carter
episode? Classic.
Crimping Birds of a feather style together.
OK, not quite, but Farrah Fawcett’s
feathered look hasn’t lost its
momentum since the 1970s. First
sported by the Charlie’s Angels star,
famous personalities such as Blake
Lively and just about every actress
on Pretty Little Liars are drawing
inspiration from Farrah’s blow-in-
the-wind bangs.
Feathering
Before Amy Winehouse’s legendary
beehive, there was Margaret Vinci
Heldt, who owned a salon on
Chicago’s Michigan Avenue in
1960. Heldt developed the ’do when
what was then Modern Beauty Shop
magazine asked for an innovative
style for its February issue.
Inspired by a velvet fez-style hat,
the towering head-topper spurred
a hairspray-crazed trend that has
since been worn by everyone
from Audrey Hepburn to sitcom
seductress Joan Harris in Mad Men.
Beehive
Flappers might have made bobs
famous, but it was ballroom
dancer Irene Castle who first
popularized the hairstyle circa 1915.
Although Castle cut her hair out
of convenience, many women in
the 1920s turned the “Castle bob”
into a symbol of rebellion. At the
same time women achieved the
right to vote and started playing
sports, rebellious youth lopped their
locks to break conventional rules of
femininity. Who knew a few snips
could be so scandalous?
Bob
Also called “track braids,” these
intricately woven strands of hair
worn by people in many African
cultures began in, well, Africa. As
people practicing the braiding
developed patterns and skill there as
well as in the Caribbean, cornrows
grew to represent agriculture, order
and civilization. Slaves in the U.S.
wore them as a way of clinging
to their African heritages, but the
style died out after the Civil War. It
wasn’t until the 1960s black power
movement that the look cropped
up again and went from social
statement to fad fashion over the
next few years.
Cornrows
While a student at Yale in the late
1920s, John Hay Whitney coined
the term “crew cut.” He was on the
rowing team and yearned for a style
that would stay out of his eyes while
he handled the oars. The close-
cropped buzz remained popular
through the 1950s and morphed
into Ivy League variations such as
the Princeton Cut, the Harvard
Clip and the College Cut.
Crew cut
12. The two types of
fuzz are chemically
indistinguishable, but
their length, texture and
growth pattern differ
based on species. That’s
why you don’t look like
your Maltese, and why,
thankfully, you’ll never be
classified as a Wookie.
It turns out bedhead
is the perfect way
to mourn lost sleep.
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PHOTOSBYORCOURTESYOFFLICKR:BIKINGNIKONSFO,CAROPHOTO,GILLESSANMARTIN;WIKIMEDIACOMMONS
Contrary to the
name, naked mole
rats aren’t entirely
nude. Because
they’re blind, they
have tiny thin hairs
that work like
whiskers on their
feet and faces. The
small mammals also
have hair around
their feet that
sweeps the soil out
of the way, which,
you know, keeps
them out of any
hairy situations.
Lice are the little vermin usually found
at the nape of the neck and behind the
ears of preschool and elementary school
kids, not to mention the adults who
care for them.
Pubic lice, fondly dubbed “crabs,”
are typically found in the pubic area,
and also in facial hair, eyelashes,
eyebrows, armpits, chest hair and
sometimes on the scalp.
So, what makes Little League lice
and pelvic pests different? In this case,
looks matter. Head and body lice are
practically twins, and pube infestors
are crab lookalikes.
But seafaring nickname aside, lice
are also distinguished by how they
spread. Head and body lice pass via
personal contact and shared personal
items, whereas crabs transfer through
contact of personal parts.Yes, it’s an
STD. Hence those merkin mullets we
were talking about.
There’s nothing sexier than a parasite-free partner.
Researchers think body shaving started as a way
to prevent lice and other fleas from latching on.
Once upon a shave, bare skin signified cleanliness
to potential mates, so they think that’s how it
slowly transitioned to a beauty standard. Steamy.
A merkin is false hair for the outside
of a female hoo-ha. The word’s
origin is uncertain, but these little
wigs came about around the early
1600s because back then there was
no other remedy for crabs than to go
Brazilian, which wasn’t in vogue yet.
In modern times, merkins
have drag queen and Hollywood
fame, but not because of the STD.
Actresses such as Kate Winslet in
The Reader and Samantha on Sex
and the City have donned these tiny
toupées because MPAA ratings won’t
allow a woman’s natural nether
regions to be featured on the big
screen without an NC-17 rating.
In ancient times, mourners
muddled their manes to
show grief. Greek women
even tore out hair at funerals
as an outward expression of
their inner angst. Ouch.
Are naked
mole rats
really naked?
What’s the
difference
between hair
and fur?
What the heck is a ?
Are there different kinds of
lice, and where do lice live?
13. What does
actually do?
0 8 . 0 7 . 1 4 | V O X M A G A Z I N E . C O M 13
Aftershave used just to be for allure but
has become much more. Many types are
infused with antiseptic agents that close
up pores, disinfect razor cuts and remove
oils from skin post shave. As for the
scents, marketers think they have romantic
resonance: Old-school scents such as
bay rum are the key to a woman’s heart.
Allegedly.
Early Greek
philosophers set aside
30 days a year to
imitate the facial hair
of the gods, but today’s
intellectuals don’t track
in beard growth. The
modern movement
began in Australia with
Movember, or Mustache
November. In 1999 and
again in 2004, groups of
men grew stellar ’staches
to raise awareness of
prostate cancer. Since
then, the month-long
ritual has represented
multiple causes, but
it garnered American
fame when those facial
philanthropies switched
to beard battles.
is a term used to describe men’s
grooming below the belt. Urban
Dictionary submitters say the trim got
its terminology from some simple word
play. But some also suggest the word’s
definition is as innocent as wooing a
woman with free lawn-care services.
Let us set the record straight: In no
way is this kind of landscaping date
conversation.
The numbers are clipper guard
lengths that evenly measure desired
trims down fractions of an inch.
Counts can vary, but they usually
work something like this:
Shaving has been a ritual practice since Australian swimmers in the
1956 Olympic Games sported smooth shaves at the pool. A 1989
Sharp and Costill study found swimmers’ bods moved faster sans
fur. The reduction in drag caused distance-per-stroke to increase,
but factors such as suits and pool speeds could influence those
findings. And many swimmers believe bare skin has psychological
perks. Shaving removes dead skin cells, which apparently makes
that underwater jaunt feel simply sensational.
Big, small, preened or combed: A famous mustache is hard to forget. Take a look at our favorites:
What do men’s clipper
numbers mean?
“I’m not the hairiest of guys,
but I can tell you I glide
in the water much easier
when shaved or wearing a
bodysuit and cap.”
Swimmer, Maryland native Ryan Kirsch
Does shaving really make swimmers
move faster?
“Manscaping”
#8
#7
#6
#5
#4
#3
#2
#1
How did No-Shave
November start?
14. 14 V O X M A G A Z I N E . C O M | 0 8 . 0 7 . 1 4
Barber: [bahr-ber] noun a person who cuts hair and shaves
or trims beards as an occupation. The title comes
from the Latin word barba, which means beard.
Hairdresser: [hair-dres-er] noun a person who cuts and styles
hair as an occupation.
In black culture, hair is a woman’s crowning glory.
So, I guess my hair was like the crown of the queen
of England; it was long, thick and coiled with an icy
black sheen. When I wore my hair straight, many
people thought it was a weave and tried to comb their
fingers through it to make sure I didn’t have any hidden
extensions.
Everyone loved my crown, except me.
I hated having daylong styling sessions in the beauty
shop and fearing that I would sweat it out when I played
sports. I even beat up a friend in sixth grade for pouring
water on my hair the day after I had gotten it done. But,
most importantly, I felt that all that hair just didn’t fit me.
It took me seven years to finally muster the courage
to cut it off. I was afraid of what people would think
about me and that my beauty would somehow diminish
by the absence of my long locks. But one day, the fear of
what others thought became less important than what I
thought about myself. So, I took a leap of faith and did
my first big chop when I turned 18. A year later, I shaved
all of my hair off.
Although my family and friends were initially
shocked, they grew to accept my new look. Some people
love it, and others still try to get me to grow my hair
back. But I refuse. My crown is finally the way I want —
free, bold and beautiful. Just like me.
Gents, thank puberty for your fuzzy pecs. When the
wonder years hit, hormones called androgens kick in,
and men begin sprouting hairs on their faces and chests.
Women are less likely to go Wolverine because of their
lower androgen levels. Let’s call this the other gender gap.
Why do men grow chest
hair and women don’t?
by Marian McPherson
Forget biker gang
stereotypes. Your
bearded buds are
totally sensitive. Beard
growth depends on the
body’s sensitivity to
testosterone, so fellas
with substantial stubble
are more genetically
susceptible to the
hormone.
18feet 5.54inches
The length of the longest hair in the
world, belonging to Xie Qiuping of Guilin
City, China. She has been growing her
trailing tresses since age 13.
Other records for longest hair include:
Eyebrow hair: 7.1 inches
Ear hair: 7.12 inches
Arm hair: 7.44 inches
Highest hairstyle: 8.73 feet
Hair extension: 2,691 feet, 3 inches
Beard (male): 17 feet, 6 inches
Beard (female): 10 inches
If you freak out mid-shower because clumps of your
hair seem to be coming out in droves, don’t fret.
The average person
loses between
50 and 100 strands
of hair per day. Phew!
15. 0 8 . 0 7 . 1 4 | V O X M A G A Z I N E . C O M 15
“Daywalker” is the
Twilight of insults.
Often used to describe
redheads, the term
suggests a person is
a vampire who never
sees sunlight. This is
hilarious, obviously, but
mean. Those notorious
redhead-haters on South
Park don’t need any
encouragement.
“Nappy” is a no. The
insult has roots in the
belief that natural black
hair is unattractive,
which is quite a few
hairs out of line. Fix
your faux pas, and use
the word “curly” instead.
After all, the spring-
action of some untreated
black hair shouldn’t go
unnoticed.
“Dishwater blonde” gets
quite the dirt. Telling
people their hair looks
like it was dunked in a
dirty sink is pretty low.
Like Mom told us, if you
can’t say anything nice,
don’t say anything at
all — or else maybe you
should wash your mouth
out with the soap used to
wash those dishes.
10 pairs
of scissorsis the most ever used in
one hand during a haircut.
Edward Scissorhands not
included.
makes the hair clippings of Elvis Presley the most
expensive hair ever sold online, auctioned by the
King’s personal barber, Homer “Gill” Gilleland.
$115,120
1,672
257
The number of
people at the
largest gathering of
natural redheads
The number of
people at the
largest gathering
of mohawks
Ancient Egyptians used
a fat-based hair “gel” to
keep mummy mops in
place. Afterparties never
looked so ghouled.
What? Of course not — you’re dead.
Get your hair length exactly how
you want it before your funeral
because that’s all you’re gonna have
to work with. It might look like your
hair is longer because your skin
dries out and shrinks post-mortem,
but that’s not cute, either.
Does your hair keep
growing after death?
Troy Polamalu of the Steelers
insured his hair for $1 million.
PHOTOSBYORCOURTESYOFFLIKR:PIMGEERTS,MONJACONPATINES;MARIANMCPHERSON;THEASSOCIATEDPRESS
16. 16 V O X M A G A Z I N E . C O M | 0 8 . 0 7 . 1 4
PHOTOSBYORCOURTESYOFCORYHENDRICK;FLIKR:CAROPHOTO,GRIZZLYMOUNTAINARTS
Some Native
American tribes
allow young
women to grow
their hair longer
once they reach
a certain age.
Others have
special hairstyles
to indicate a
woman is ready
for marriage.
In Africa, the
Yoruba people
shave heads
to signify life
transitions. Hair is
shorn off at birth
and again after
death. Young
women of the
Akan in western
Liberia and Sierra
Leone region also
get new hairstyles
after puberty.
Traditionally, in
China, it was
considered
disfigurement for
a woman to cut
her hair or shave
her head.
Japanese samurai
chose a new name
and hairstyle when
they wanted to
become adults
and marry.
Some Polynesians
on the Cook
Islands cut boys’
hair for the first
time in a rite of
passage that
shows the boys’
masculinity. The
practice stems
from a belief that
hair has spiritual
powers.
In Europe, young
girls typically wore
their hair down
until age 16. They
began pinning it
up as an indication
of maturity.
1) Not a hair out of place
2) By a hair
3) Didn’t turn a hair
4) Wouldn’t harm a hair on
someone’s head
5) In the cross hairs
6) Split hairs
7) Get out of my hair
8) Make your hair curl
9) Made my hair stand on end
10) Let your hair down
11) Pulled my hair out
12) Hair of the dog
13) Hang by a hair
14) Thin on top
a) To frighten someone
b) To depend on something small
c) To relax
d) To quibble
e) To stop being annoying
f) To not show emotion
g) To go bald
h) To get agitated
i) To use alcohol as a hangover cure
j) To just barely do something
k) To be terrified
l) To be about to be criticized
m) To have a tidy appearance
n) To be harmless
Don’t get tangled up in hair puns
Leviticus 19:27, a book in the
Torah, says not to cut hair
on the sides of the head. For
this reason, some Jews abstain
from completely clipping their
side curls off, and Hasidic Jews
take the extra step to grow
their sideburns out longer.
They use curlers or twist them
around their fingers to coil
them. Some men choose to
just tuck them behind their
ears, though.
Many cultures use hair ornaments for
symbolic purposes. In ancient Japan, people
believed ornaments such as thin Kanzashi
hair sticks could protect them from evil, so
they wore them in their hair. Greek and
Native American hair adornment often
includes feathers or flowers, and in the
U.S., some African-Americans in the 1960s
wore Afro picks with black fists on them
to symbolize black power.
Why ornament your hair?
Why do some
Jewish men
have long
side curls?
Answers:1-m,2-j,3-f,4-n,5-l,6-d,7-e,8-a,9-k,
10-c,11-h,12-i,13-b,14-g
Gendered hair lengths have been around for centuries,
dating back to early Jewish and Christian societies. In
a letter from the apostle Paul to the Corinthians, Paul
writes, “Does not nature itself teach you that for a man
to wear long hair is degrading to him, but if a woman
wears long hair it is pride?” Thus, men’s cropped cuts
took hold.
Why do men
traditionally
have short hair
and women
have long?
17. These days,
asking a
hairdresser
to mullet
your hair
might leave
you looking like David Bowie,
but in 1932, the second edition
of Webster’s New International
Dictionary defined “mullet” as a
verb meaning “to curl or dress the
hair.” Talk about language barriers.
0 8 . 0 7 . 1 4 | V O X M A G A Z I N E . C O M 17
For most of my life I have known I am different.
I grew up in Arkansas and never felt like I fit in.
In preschool, if you asked me what I wanted to be
when I grew up, my answer was always “a boy.” It
wasn’t until an adult told me that was impossible
that I stopped giving that answer.
I kept my hair long until I was 21, usually
sticking it up in a messy bun. Growing up, I was
often derogatorily labeled as gay and teased. So,
keeping my hair long was a way to blend in and
avoid the “othering” that happens when you
are different. The bun never came down, and I
couldn’t get up the guts to cut it off.
Everything changed when I started playing
roller derby. The sport promotes body positivity,
player empowerment and intense athleticism. As
I delved into training, I was able to let go of my
inhibitions about my gender, sex and orientation.
And because of that change, I finally worked up
the nerve to ask my teammate Scarlet Knuckles to
cut my hair into a mohawk.
Now, my mohawk gives me the courage to
be true to myself. After being stuck within the
limitations of a binary gender system, it is such a
relief to just be me. Warriors in different cultures
have worn mohawks for centuries. I consider
myself a gender outlaw — a transgender warrior.
It’s an honor to be able to have such a powerful
hairstyle, and it is a privilege to wear it every
single day of my life.
Don’t be ridiculous. Apparently, the
most common thing associated with
this depilatory product is a chemical
or soap burn, which can be avoided
by not using soap to wash away
product. The scorch sucks, and users
risk infection, but thus far Nair hasn’t
been proven to cause cancer.
Shorn
identity
Hair theft has the world wigging out.
From extensions to freshly cut human
hair, cases of stolen locks have cropped
up in countries such as South Africa, India
and the United States. The crime, which
usually ends with payouts of $80 to $500,
can be anything from a salon break-in
to an unwarranted clip. In Venezuela, for
instance, hair thieves known as Piranhas
attack women with long hair and cut it off.
18. 18 V O X M A G A Z I N E . C O M | 0 8 . 0 7 . 1 4
Columbia native Charles Bay has singing
in his blood.
From a young age, Bay accompaied
his father to chorus pratice. Eventually,
Bay, one of his nephews and Bay’s father
all joined a group called the Boonslick
Chordbusters. But several years ago,
other members began talking about
starting their own quartet in addition
to the Chordbusters, and Bay saw an
opportunity to form a new, smaller
family of singers.
The new quartet’s name, The Boone
County Hams, is a nod to both the
famously salty local variety of ham and
the group’s lighthearted, humorous
nature. “We like to ham it up,” Bay says.
The quartet is frequently hired to
sing at events around town such as Art in
the Park at Stephens Lake Park. Holiday
gigs, singing Valentines and birthday
wishes are also popular, they say.
The Hams primarily sing
barbershop-style a cappella, which means
they’re unaccompanied by instruments
and without the vocal percussion of other
a cappella styles.
“In other a cappella, sometimes you
have a lead part and other parts sing ‘do’
or ‘bum’ or something like that, but in
barbershop everyone sings the words,”
says Hams member Bob Huseby.
The Hams view barbershop as a true
test of a vocalist’s ability to sing in close
harmony with three other voices.
“It keeps you very truthful because
you don’t have autotune or instruments
backing you up, and it’s also not like a
cappella where a lot of guys are (singing
instrumental sounds),” says barbershop
singer Joe McLean. “When you go to
an international barbershop convention
and hear these (top quartets) sing just
amazingly, I feel like that’s some of the
best vocalizing in the world because
that’s what it takes to perform a fancy
barbershop chart well.”
Barbershop vocal harmony traces
back to the spirituals sung by African-
Americans, especially in the improvised
harmonies. It steadily gained popularity
during the Tin
Pan Alley era of
the early 20th
century, when a
group of Manhattan
songwriters
dominated
American music.
At that time,
songwriters wrote
straightforward
melodies that could be sung by
recreational singers of average talent.
“The term ‘barbershop’ actually
comes from the singing taking place
in barbershops and other places where
men would be gathered together and
socializing,” Chordbusters Director Dave
Carlisle says.
Norman Rockwell’s 1936 painting
“Barbershop Quartet,” which depicts a
group of barbers
and customers
mid-song, captures
the feeling of such
gatherings.
As with other
types of vocal
music, barbershop
harmonies are
usually sung in
four parts. The
lead carries the melody, the tenor
harmonizes above it, the bass sings
the lowest harmonizing notes, and the
baritone completes the chord, usually
by singing lower than the lead. During
McLean’s first practice with the group,
the members tried out different parts to
figure out who should sing each position.
Like the Chordbusters, the Hams
span a broad age range. Huseby and
McLean are in their early 20’s, whereas
Bay and Emerson are both nearly twice
their age. “You think of barbershop as
old guys with suspenders,” McLean says.
But the groups that win competitions
and attend conventions often encompass
multiple generations.
For McLean, much of barbershop’s
appeal lies in its ability to connect a
wide range of people. “It has a real
brotherhood aspect,” he says. “You’ll see
people from different countries just come
together and teach each other a tag, or
jump in and sing a song they all
already know.”
Barbershop quartet carries tunes and traditions
BY PAUL ALBANI-BURGIO
MUSIC
Hams in harmony
The Boone County Hams rehearse a melody. The group has been making music together for
about two years. Photo by J. EVAN ARNOLD
“It keeps you very truthful
because you don’t have
autotune or instruments
backing you up.”
— Joe McLean,
barbershop enthusiast
A.
F.
B.
G.
C.
H.
D.
I.
E.
J.
HAIRDO-RE-MI Some of these singers have been taking center stage for more than half a century, but all their styles
have stolen the show. Now, we’re shining a spotlight on their cuts, up-dos and other distinctive hairdos.
How many can you guess? – NICOLE JONES
ANSWERS:A.LadyGagaB.ElvisPresleyC.MarilynMonroeD.ArethaFranklinE.JustinBieberF.DianaRossG.PaulMcCartneyH.RebaMcEntireI.MileyCyrusJ.BobMarley
ILLUSTRATIONSBYLAURENELLIOTTANDAARONFRANCO
19. 0 8 . 0 7 . 1 4 | V O X M A G A Z I N E . C O M 19
PHOTOSCOURTESYOFDIANAHUNTSUCKER
Fans use offbeat tools to
create realistic costumes
BY LAURA HECK
ARTS
Making the coif
Left: Diana Huntsucker as Sansa Stark at an Archon convention in
2013. Right: Huntsucker won the Best in Journeyman class when she
dressed as Queen Amidala at Archon in 2012.
Cosplay, or costumed role play, takes hair in many,
er, directions. Nevermind the intricate costumes,
accessories and fake weaponry involved; for dedicated
fans, imitating the gravity-defying ’dos found in 2-D
stories and cartoons is an important part of conventions.
When Diana Huntsucker, a day-care worker and
Columbia College student, was going to dress up
as Queen Amidala from Star Wars, she fashioned a
large headpiece that stuck up 1 foot from her scalp to
replicate Natalie Portman’s elaborate headwear. “It
was pretty difficult to make, and it’s pretty difficult
to wear,” she says. Huntsucker bought two packages
of loose synthetic hair-like fibers called wefts from a
hair supply store and wrapped them around a plastic
foam base to create a Geisha-like effect. The piece still
hangs on her wall.
At cosplay conventions, fans of TV shows, books,
movies, video games and comics often impersonate
their favorite characters. They adopt the characters’
personalities, mannerisms and, of course, style.
Not everyone agrees just how important the
hair is to a costume, but cosplayers do agree that it’s
completely necessary.
For Huntsucker and Karissa Brickey, who works at
Gotcha! costume shop, about half of a costume’s appeal
comes from the hair and makeup. Brickey dresses
up for conventions around Columbia and Jefferson
City. She says a lot of people come into the shop for
wigs and accessories. She
recommends using Clorox
bleach to take the shine
off synthetic fibers of wigs
and using Windex to work
out tangles.
Huntsucker,
though, isn’t just a
casual cosplayer. She
enters several cosplay
competitions per year
and next year plans to
take her show on the
road to several
bigger cities
to compete for
money. She has
been Baby Doll
from Sucker
Punch, Subaro
from .hack//
link and Link
from Zelda.
Although she
makes five or
six costumes a
year, she focuses
more time and money on two or three for the contests
she enters.
Cosplayers imitate a lot of characters that are out
of this world; that is, some might not even be human.
Wigs can help achieve the length and variety of style
fans are looking for.
Without wigs, and sometimes with them, it
takes takes creativity to make the locks of fictional
characters come to life. Huntsucker’s Blair the Witch
had curlicues of hair sticking out several inches from
the side of her head. She glued fiber wig hairs to a
14-gauge wire, which can be bent straight for travel
and looped back around again when it’s show time.
For Sansa Stark’s elaborate 3-foot-long braids, she
bought wefts and attached them to the synthetic wig.
Cardboard, plastic foam or pipe cleaners are all fair
game in cosplay.
But for some characters, particularly anime, it’s
less about the theatrics and more about subtle shaping.
“Anime characters have the same cut-and-paste face,”
Huntsucker says of trimming the wigs’ fringeline. “So
getting the hairline right is really important.”
There’s a considerable amount of know-how
needed to create fictional hairstyles, but it’s not hard to
find help or learn tricks of the trade. Huntstucker says
most of her hair strategy comes from the Internet and
tutorials. And other cosplayers often share tips freely.
“People in the anime community are very generous
and willing to share how they did something,” she
says. “We don’t exactly profit from this, we just love
to do it.”
To get the perfect hair color, it’s often necessary for cosplayers to purchase wigs.They use supplies such as carboard, wire and
plastic foam to match a character’s look. Diana Huntsucker’s Blair the Witch costume required a wig and wire.
20. 20 V O X M A G A Z I N E . C O M | 0 8 . 0 7 . 1 4
PHOTOSCOURTESYOFKNOPF;ECCO;DARKHORSEBOOKS;DOUBLEDAY;PRIMEBOOKS
BOOKS
Hair-raising reads
Books so spooky they’ll levitate your locks
BY DOMINIQUE FELDMAN
Sink your teeth into these tantalizing tomes from 2014, and enter the world of dark
fiction. But beware: You might find you never want to return. Here are five of the year’s
spookiest reads, handpicked by Vox editors.
Grab your security blanket ’cause there are goose bumps ahead.
THEYEAR’S BEST DARK FANTASY AND HORROR (2014)
Edited by Paula Guran
Release date: June 17
List price: $19.95
Why settle for one story when you can have 32? Since 2010,
this annual guide to the world of dark fantasy has been rife with
tension, thrill, mystery and adventure. This compendium contains
an array of work from innovative authors, including Neil Gaiman.
BIRD BOX
By Josh Malerman
Release date: May 13
List price: $25.99
Malerman brings a new twist to the apocalypse. There exists an
unknown evil that, after people see it, provokes immense violence.
In a world of few survivors and many dangers, Malorie and her
two children attempt to reach a safer place while blindfolded.
THE WINTER PEOPLE
By Jennifer McMahon
Release date: Feb. 11
List price: $25.95
In a small Vermont town full of strange disappearances, old
stories might prove to be more than just legends. Teenage Ruthie
and her mother move into the old farmhouse of a woman and her
daughter who both died in 1908. Ruthie finds herself entangled in
the puzzle of the family’s fate.
PRINCE LESTAT:THE VAMPIRE CHRONICLES
By Anne Rice
Release date: Oct. 28
List price: $28.95
The queen of bloodsucking books is back. Take a bite out of the
sequel to The Vampire Lestat (1986). The now-chaotic vampire
world is threatened by a mysterious voice that awakens ancient
vampires and commands them to destroy their younger kin.
THE STRAIN:VOLUME 4:THE FALL
By David Lapham, et al., inspired by Guillermo del Toro
Release date: July 15
List price: $19.99
Vampires meet zombies in this tale of vampiric plague, now
adapted for TV and comics. Dr. Ephraim Goodweather is back
for another installment, and he’s joined by an ancient pawnbroker
and a street gang. Together, they must recover an ancient text
containing the secret to stopping the Master and his minions.
CHEAP
3305A Clark Lane, Columbia, MO • 573.814.5111
Expires 9/4/14
• Cigarettes
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• Vapors/ E-Cigs
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Supplies
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• Special
Orders!
Bring this coupon in receive $1 OFF
any purchase of $20 or more!*
*Must be 21 or older. Offer expires 9/4/14.
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21. The to-do list
THIS WEEK IN COLUMBIA
THURSDAY, AUGUST 7
Stephens Lake Amphitheater
Concert Series: Unsigned
Artists Showcase
Radio station 102.3 KBXR brings you
five Columbia acts that are shooting for
the stars: Rae Fitzgerald, Tidal Volume,
AKA Voodoo Women, The Late Night
Benedictions and The Passion. Stephens
Lake Park Amphitheater, 7 p.m., Free,
874-7460
Guys and Dolls
When you see a guy reach for the stars
in the sky, you can bet he’s doing it
for some doll — even if he’s, like, 10
years old. Performing Arts in Children’s
Education puts on a youthful rendition of
the 1950s romantic comedy that became
a Broadway classic. Missouri Theatre,
7 p.m., $8–12, 882-3781
Skye Apollo EP Release Party
Springfield-based duo Douglas Morris and
Dillan Simpson joined forces to create
Skye Apollo. Via Lumen (an “instrumental
art/math-rock quartet”), imag(e)nation and
Coffee will also perform. We’re not sure
what an art/math-rock quartet entails,
but it sounds like a class we’d like to
take. Mojo’s, 8:30 p.m., Free; $2 minor
surcharge, 874-1944
Mark Sweeney
He’s a do-it-all comedian who has seen
it all, too. Mark Sweeney has been on
HBO, CBS and Comedy Central, among
other networks, and he’s spent time in
Afghanistan and Iraq. Those experiences
add perspective to his comedy bit. Déjà
Vu, 9:45 p.m.; 9 p.m., Fri.; 8 and 10 p.m.,
Sat.; $8–10, 443-3216
FRIDAY, AUGUST 8
Murder Mystery DinnerTrain
This is no ordinary night on the Columbia
Star Dinner Train. The three-hour trip
features a three-course meal and, for the
first-time, some Clue-like entertainment.
6501 North Brown Station Road, 7 p.m.,
$69.95, 474-2223
Movies in the Park:
Despicable Me 2
Life stays exciting for the turtleneck-
bedecked Gru thanks to his three adopted
girls and millions of miniscule minions.
Grab a blanket, and head over to Flat
Branch Park to watch the Despicable Me
sequel beneath the stars. Flat Branch
Park, 8:30 p.m., $2 for ages 9 and up,
874-7460
TheTerry Quiett Band with
MercuryTrio
The Mercury Trio and Dave Angle will
join the Terry Quiett Band on stage at
Mojo’s. The latter group released a new
album, “Taking Sides,” just this year.
Quiett is known for his bluesy sound
and a (guitar) slide more epic than the
Verrückt. Mojo’s, 8:30 p.m., $5–7,
874-1944
SATURDAY, AUGUST 9
Water Gun Run
Focus on Health Chiropractic is hosting
its third annual Water Gun Run. It’s like
running through the sprinkler, except
better. This 5K run/walk benefits St. Jude
Children’s hospital. Focus On Health
Chiropractic, 9 a.m., $25, 777-5900
Hiroshima-Nagasaki 69th
Anniversary Commemoration
Mid-Missouri Peaceworks will observe
the 69th anniversary of the nuclear strikes
on Hiroshima and Nagasaki. The event will
begin with a potluck and lantern making.
Organization members Mariana Morales
and Jeff Stack will speak. Gordon Shelter
at Stephens Lake Park, 6 p.m., Free,
875-0539
Joe Lewis
If you thought the blues were supposed
to be sad, you haven’t heard Joe Lewis.
He’s got music with a message. It’s what
he calls the “Good News Blues.” He has
another outdoor show in September, but
catch this one before the cooler weather
sets in. Cooper’s Landing, 7 p.m., Free,
657-2544
The Black Diamond: A Neil
DiamondTribute
Sing along with Neil Diamond voice-alike
The Black Diamond. Columbia native
Theron Denson aims to distract listeners
from life’s everyday problems. Everyone
can join in a chorus of “Sweet Caroline”
and forget their sorrows. The Blue Note,
7:30 p.m., $12–30, 874-1944
Make aYummy Summer Snack
Refresh your diet, and satisfy your sweet
tooth with fruit-infused summer recipes.
Registered dietitians will be on hand
to teach healthy food seekers how to
measure, chop, mix and arrange fruit
into delicious desserts designed for the
Missouri heat. Columbia Public Library,
2 p.m., Free, 443-3161
Soul Glo
Columbia’s own “Funk and Soul Revue”
will break it down at Mojo’s with a little
help from The Spread and Richard Parker.
They call it a multi-generational funk
extravaganza. Sound groovy? Oh yeah, it
does. Mojo’s, 8:30 p.m., $5–7, 874-1944
SUNDAY, AUGUST 10
The Fairley Brothers
It’s a band of brothers from Boonville,
and they’re revving up for their first CD
release. Come hear their original tunes
as they ring out across the river. Cooper’s
Landing, 2 p.m., Free, 657-2544
Get Pop-Cultured: Page and
Screen Panel Discussion
We’ve all said it: The movie is never as
good as the book. Now, Ragtag Cinema
director Tracy Lane will tell us what it
takes to bring stories from the printing
press to the silver screen. Barnes
Noble, 2 p.m., Free, 445-4080
Fan Day
The weather might not be right for
football, but steadfast football fans can
beat the heat. Get to Memorial Stadium
for the Tigers’ annual meet and greet on
Faurot Field. Memorial Stadium,
3:45 p.m., Free, 882-6501
DON’T MISS: NFL PUNT PASS KICK
Who’s the young Peyton Manning of Columbia? The NFL’s Punt Pass Kick program offers
kids the chance to prove their throwing arms and kicking abilities. No cleats allowed,
though. Sat., Aug. 9, Cosmo Park Football Field No. 4, 10 a.m., Free, 874-7460
WEEKDAY
BLUES?
MONDAY, AUGUST 11
Rainbow House Golf Classic
The PGA, local businesses and
Columbia’s Rainbow House chapter
partner for a day of golf and
fundraising. Country Club of Missouri,
7:45 a.m., $200–5,000, 474-6600
TUESDAY, AUGUST 12
Kenny Wayne Shepherd Band
Get your “Blue on Black” on with the
Kenny Wayne Shepherd Band. The
blues artist says he wants to bring light
into people’s lives. Let’s hope he can
make that dream a reality. The Blue
Note, 7 p.m., $25–27, 874-1944
WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 13
Wizard of Oz Celebration
Click your heels three times, and head
to Columbia Public Library to celebrate
the 75th anniversary of Dorothy Gale’s
trip down the Yellow Brick Road with
games and activities. Columbia Public
Library, 6 p.m., Free, 443-3161
Jesse Cook
Jesse Cook took up the guitar after
being inspired by renowned gypsy
guitarist (and Picasso’s pal) Manitas de
Plata. Cook’s debut album, Tempest,
was No. 14 on the American Billboard
charts. The Blue Note, 8 p.m., $25–27,
874-1944
0 8 . 0 7 . 1 4 | V O X M A G A Z I N E . C O M 21
PHOTOCOURTESYOFNFLPUNTPASSKICK
23. 0 8 . 0 7 . 1 4 | V O X M A G A Z I N E . C O M 23
It’s been eight years since Jonathan Sessions last shaved
off his beard and four since he was first elected, at
age 27, to the Columbia School Board. It’s unclear
which of these events was more significant in his
life. Although most men are content to either grow
facial hair or shave it off, Sessions goes a step further
and extends beard advocacy to politics. In 2008, he
thought up the idea for the Bearded Entrepreneurs
for the Advancement of a Responsible Democracy
political action committee, or BEARD PAC, devoted
to “independently support the candidacies of bearded
candidates nationwide.” The PAC registered with the
Federal Elections Committee in 2013.
Even if the BEARD PAC was never meant to
take the electoral process by storm, news of its launch
reached as far as Time magazine. Media interest
has since died down, but Sessions remains one of
Columbia’s influential bearded figures, as well as being
owner of technology consulting company Tech 2. His
facial hair probably isn’t going away anytime soon, not
as long as Sessions’ girlfriend endorses it: “I love it,”
says Carrie Gartner, current director of The District.
“I have to say, I am 100 percent pro-beard.”
How old were you when you started growing
serious facial hair?
I probably grew my first beard at 19 or 20. It ebbed
and flowed for a little while, but I’ve had a beard
pretty consistently for about eight years. My beard
grows pretty fast. I trim it back every couple of days
to keep it pretty neat and tidy. Otherwise, it quickly
looks unwieldy and like something animals with
exoskeletons would want to live inside.
Why did you first decide to grow a beard?
When I was younger, I had the babiest of baby
faces. I used to have longer hair that went back, and
I could comb it down. I could easily walk into a high
school and blend in with the students. So, definitely,
the beard was grown at an earlier age purely to
counteract the fact that I was a small business
owner who looked like he was 12.
Beards are often associated with hipsters. Do
you consider yourself a hipster?
I am by no means hip, which is probably the first
step in being a hipster. I have had a beard since,
well, before I ever heard the phrase “hipster” being
used. No one who is a hipster would call
themselves a hipster. But no, I do not consider
myself a hipster.
Who are your major facial hair influences?
When you’re leading a Super PAC dedicated to
getting bearded candidates elected, it’s all of the
important political figures with beards. I think
Abraham Lincoln had a very quality beard, though it
was a little too chin-strappy for me. James Garfield
had a pretty solid beard. There are beards that
influence me, in a way, to manage my beard. I look
at the Duck Dynasty folks and think, “I am not
going there.”
What’s your take on innovations in beard and
mustache care?
There are a lot of things that are sold that you could
do with a pair of scissors and a comb. It’s a lot like
kitchen appliances. There’s a million things you can
do in the kitchen with a fork, but we sell an egg
beater. There are so many appliances that you buy
for your kitchen that are truly just highly specialized
versions of a fork. But the electric trimmer with a
vacuum, it saves me some time in the morning.
Are there any beard myths or stereotypes you
would like to bust?
You have, in many cases, the Disney villain complex.
The villain is often the one with facial hair of some
kind. They managed to draw a lion with a beard (for
The Lion King). Lions have manes — that’s fine —
but they drew an evil lion with a beard. There’s a
stereotype there, I think, that helps feed the mythos
of the clean-shaven Prince Charming versus the
bearded villain. At the same time, there are studies
that show bearded people are often considered
more trustworthy. So, a lot of it may be individuals’
personal perception. When it’s all said and done,
growing a beard is a personal choice, and being
trustworthy or untrustworthy is completely
unrelated.
If you could have any famous figure’s beard,
whose would you have?
I’m pretty comfortable in my own beard.
QA
A CONVERSATION WITH
JONATHAN SESSIONS
The BEARD PAC founder dispels stubble
myths and talks history’s top whiskers
BY PAUL ALBANI-BURGIO
PHOTO BY SHANNON ELLIOTT
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